Saturday, March 12, 2011

Are You In An Abusive Relationship?

Love is the sweetest gesture of life and everyone wants to love and to be loved. Love, is a life long friendship that escorts you in all walks of life. A healthy relationship involves mutual respect, trust, care and consideration. A relationship based on these aspects is strongly rooted and the love seems to unwind itself in different dimensions with no end to it.

However, love can also show its ugly face at times forcefully and sometimes subtly hampering the comfort and ease in a relationship. 'Abuse' is the word and it resorts to various forms.

There are various forms of abuses that can hamper love.

Symptoms of Abusing
Physical abuse is the commonly known and involves in physically harming the person like slapping, kicking, beating, pushing, grabbing, shaking, smacking, and punching.

Emotional abuse consists of threats, intimidation, putdowns and betrayal. Emotional abuse also consists of intense teasing, bullying and humiliation in the presence of others. Trying to control you in different aspects, like in the way you dress and with the people you interact with, can also affect your emotions. Frequently making you feel unworthy in the presence and also absence of others but always telling you that he/she loves you is also an emotional abuse.

Suspicion and jealousy can put you off emotionally. Being jealous insanely can make you feel claustrophobic in a relationship. Demanding to know where you are at all times and constantly getting jealous or angry can also fall under the category of emotional abuses.

Coercing or threatening to harm you if you quit the relationship is a form of an emotional blackmail.

Sexual abuse can be the unwanted sexual advances that you may be forced to.

Handling Abuses
Abuse in any of these forms cannot be appreciated, as each and every human being needs to be respected as love can be firm only if it is built on mutual respect. If you cannot love someone without getting afraid of him/her then it is time to call it quits. Undue pressure in a relationship due to the misbehaviour of the spouse calls for the relationship to culminate.

Analyse if you are happy in the relationship, whether you are treated properly. If you feel that you are not comfortable in the relationship then quit, before it is too late. Always confide with a friend who understands you. Bring the matter to the notice of your elders to look into it when you are threatened or when things go out of hand.

If you are physically or sexually abused do not hesitate to take the help of the doctors or counselors. Abusing in any form can leave a permanent scar on your mind. So it is always wise to consult a counselor to help you out of the problem.

Last but not the least, know that your self-respect is important and remember that there is no place for abuse in love.

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